my mom just asked me to move out of the house.

Don't worry, i won't disappoint your wishes mom. I will leave this house soon. You don't know how much i wanted to do that all my life. Just being around you makes my day bad...no, its not harsh, that really is how i feel.

I know time will come when i have to say goodbye to everyone. Im not getting any younger after all :)

my asshole brother

my brother is such an asshole. Not many of you guys know it but trust me, i've been living with him my whole life and he gets worse every day. He is the most selfish person in our family..heck he even is the most selfish person i know. When he was younger, my dad always gives him what he wants..maybe that's the reason why he's like this today. I find him funny really, he has this attitude na when he needs something from our parents..may it be money, or help, or something, he acts "mabait" to them. But if he doesn't need anything he acts like he has no parents..he doesn't even give time for them anymore. What kind of son is he? you guys tell me..He spent most of his years being dependent to our parents..even after finally graduating college.

San naman kayo nanakita ng anak na hindi tumutulong sa magulang? Yan si kuya. May trabaho na nga, ni makaoffer manlang na xa mag bayad ng water bill (which is like 100+ only) hindi nya magawa...daily routine nya dito is ganito: when he gets home from work, he sleeps then wakes up to prepare for work again, then leaves. pag off nya, u rarely see him home..he is either at his GF or somewhere else..wow diba? kung ganyan lang din pala sya, sana namuhay nalang sya mag isa..he should have moved out years ago and worried about his own god damn life..wala din naman sya pakinabang dito sa bahay..

whether he likes it or not..mom and dad are his parents....he has an obligation to them. di na bale kaming mga kapatid nya..basta kina mama lang sana. Madami syang sinusumbat kay dad bout what he wants to do but he never sees the bigger picture na how dad wants to help him lang naman. Nowadays, my brothers been very cold to my parents specially my dad, who's been giving him all that he wanted. Nako talaga..i don't know when my brother will wake up from this HELL that he's giving our family..sana lang makaramdam naman sya at hindi PURO SARILI and iniintindi nya.

Cuddles and kisses.

I am happy! Yesterday he surprised me by coming over without me knowing....it was funny actually, i was naked in my room 'coz i just finished taking a bath when someone tried to open my door. i literally jumped for the door saying "sandali lang!!" hahahaha..i thought it was my mom! i took a second look and it was him! i told him "sandali lang ha magbibihis lang ako". After i dressed up, i opened my door and gave him a BIG HUG! i totally missed him coz i havn't seen him for days already...and the night before, i was saying to my sister how much i miss him. Until a few hours ago, everything went smoothly between us, no fights, no nothing but cuddles and kisses (teehee!) Sad though, he had to go home coz he's got school in the morning...which is alright with me :)

I gave him my hugs and kisses before he left. I hate it when he has to leave :( he promised to come back though this weekend and spend more time with me!! i am so happy :)

boyfriend blog 1

just had another fight with him last night...what's wrong with our relationship? i found out that he has a fight with someone and i asked
him what is it about...he never answered. He changed his Facebook account password so
i can't open it...is he hiding something from me?? i don't know. Sometimes its really hard for me
to deal with him since we are both from different kind of families...i find it unfair to let go of the things
i usually do just to make him feel comfortable...but still, i do it because i want him around and i love him.
He really is the perfect guy for me but i want him to mature more...i hate it when he acts childish when we
argue i hate it when he makes fun of people. I hate it when he thinks shallow and i hate it when he do stupid things.

Don't get me wrong though, there are a lot of things that i love about him but the reason we argue, is because
he does things that i do not do so i get mad at him and he asks "why do you care? why are you defending them?"
sometimes i do remain quiet, but a lot of times i answer him back which results to another fight. I want our relationship to last, but i don't know if im handling this right anymore...there are times that i want to leave him, but it makes me think of the "what about after" moments...there is so much to tell about our relationship but i will post them soon. right now, i just want to write about what i feel since i have no one to talk to about this here....moments like this is what i miss about having my sister around...she always gives me great advices and always makes my day super! i doubt if we'll ever have that again since she already has her own life. I MISS YOU SISTER! :)

Good Girl Gone Bad

I have done a lot of mistakes in my life, and how i wish i could turn back time to correct them. But i guess, mistakes are there to give us lessons to learn for.

Three years ago, i made one of the biggest mistakes of my life. Because i lack self confidence, i started to become a POSER. I used different people, made so many lies about my life. It wasn't really my plan, but i regret every second of it. Even came to as far as having relationships with people i knew and knew me as another. As all lie ends, it ended really bad. The guy i was with that time found the real girl i was using. He found out about me POSING to be her, the girl found out i was using her. It was REALLY BAD! i felt so bad so i started telling people the true story. Some were ashamed of me, they didn't wanna be my friend anymore. Some understood why i did it, and are still my friends..i know what i did was really awful and believe me, i payed for it GREATLY.

through all that trouble, i really learned a lot in my life, i earned and lost some great friends. But most importantly, i vowed never to do the same mistake twice.